[1] My wife is only moderately cooperative as she doesn't have a fat problem and isn't willing to replace sugar with glucose. The point is WE are responsible for our own future. And you, presumably, being the cook, have a lot more control than I do.
[2] David discusses the 'cold turkey" option in his books. Thinking in terms of willpower is negative thinking. And you can't win that battle. Your brain can't tell whether what you focus on is what you want or don't want. So "think positive" will give your brain the message that you want to be free, and it will go about finding ways to make you free. So instead of worrying about willpower, JUST DECIDE that you want to be your ideal weight and focus your mind on all the good things about that. Are you a golfer? or a gardener? Whatever, I'll bet that when you go to a bookshop you only "see" the books related to your area of interest . . right? Focusing on
what you want will attract the people, resources and motivation to get you there.
[3] When you crave something sweet, ask yourself "what feeling do I have" . . . and then just drop the feeling.
[4] The first thing you need to do is clean out the pantry of everything with more than 2% sugars [2 grams per 100 grams]. If you need to get an OK artificial sweetener like Stevia or Splendid . . just don't get hooked on them.
[5] Re self-esteem . . . . spend some of our "food" money on counselling :-) Find the beautiful, capable, compassionate person that you already are. Check out www.sedona.com Stop being a victim . . . be a hero to yourself :-)
[6] Above all . . . DON'T GIVE UP !
JohnN